RIGHT off the deep end!

Conservatives, newly drunk with power, are reaching critical hypocritical mass hysteria. Sane people from other countries think Americans, specifically social conservatives, have gone completely mental. The same people who see the Virgin Mary in a grilled cheese sandwich are suddenly seeing threatening gay images everywhere.

The latest is Buster, the animated rabbit from PBS's Postcards From Buster, taken to task by the new secretary of Education for having the nerve to show a normal legally united Vermont family headed by lesbians, who threatens federal funding for the show. Then there is James Dobson of Focus on the Family, decreeing that SpongeBob SquarePants is sending out subliminal gay messages to unsuspecting toddlers. The Family Research Council has on its payroll a Homosexuality Detection Expert (no joke), whose duties include informing us that words like 'tolerance' and 'diversity' are part of a coded language that is regularly used by the homosexual community to undermine their idea of the American family. We can't forget Alan Keyes--one of the most sanctimoniously obnoxious politicians in history, whose entire presidential and recent senate campaign was based on 'moral values'-- who was revealed to have a gay daughter, and responded by using his 'moral values' to kick her out of the house and withhold her college tuition. What do his fellow conservatives have to say? Nothing! Just like the Cheneys, who vocal on all other issues known to man, say nothing about their gay daughter--her sexuality being 'private.'

This would be hilarious enough if it wasn't for the recently revealed, wildest disconnect between what the right wing says and what they do-- the Jeff Gannon scandal. In this case, a fake reporter who used an alias, on behalf of a fake news organization that was nothing but a Republican propaganda outlet, who regularly wrote antigay articles, had a White House press clearance endowed by the Secret Service and used it to regularly ask the president softball questions. He was also a $200-an-hour (or $1,200-a-weekend) hustler, complete with X-rated Web photos revealing just how endowed he is. What do his fellow conservatives have to say? Nothing (oh right, there is conservative Ann Coulter, who knows a propaganda-spreading fake-reporter whore when she sees one, rushing to the defense of “Jeff,” saying that hypocritical liberals are going after him simply because he is gay)!

Have conservatives suddenly taken 'don’t ask, don’t tell' to an absurd extreme? Are they strong on terrorists but soft on gay hookers? You would expect James Dobson, Alan Keyes, or any of the other moral watchdogs to go ballistic over this guy. There has to be a logical reason why a call boy with online money shots and a White House clearance gets a fraction of the attention as SpongeBob or Buster the rabbit, but one can’t expect logic with these guys.

Apparently homosexuality is a 'private' concern if you’re a conservative Republican in lockstep with the Bush crowd, who dutifully stays in the closet, but not if you’re a Democrat, a lesbian from Vermont, an out gay American, or a sponge. And it doesn’t matter if you’re an ex-Marine gay whore; it just matters whose whore you are.

-edited from an article in The Advocate


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